The ugliest, most awesome Valentine's Day ad you've ever seen

What to buy that special someone for Valentine's Day? Some people don't have a clue. And these days, they don't have much scratch for pricey goodies. That's where the 99 Cents Only stores come in. Their homemade ads, now running in newspapers in California, Nevada and Arizona, tell would-be Romeos what to buy—and just as important, what not to buy!—for their sweeties. Chocolate rose, adorable stuffed monkey, skimpy undies and whipped cream? Yes! Broom, pregnancy test, douche and anti-fungal cream? No!

It's become an annual event for the L.A.-based deep discounter, and the chain's fans often send in e-mail requests for copies. Buyers, PR and marketing executives get together to pick the items that will be featured. "We think everybody could use a laugh right now, so we tried to make it as humorous as possible," says Diana DeLoza, the chain's marketing manager. "That's why we included the Itchy Feet cream. Even the name of the product is funny."

The chain, which made news last year for mulling a price hike, has remained true to its branding, but has bumped up to 99.99 cents on some items. Still, that's a lovely bargain.
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